Oh man... what a terrible night i had last night...- _ - ... wenqi was having some troubles and i was unable to comfort her ... so naturally i feel really horrible... and went to sleep... but i woke up in the middle of the night after having nightmares... and den i tried to slp again.. this time i was semi-concious .... unable to sleep and unable to wake up .... freak man.... and while in this state i had several nightmares.... i can only remember 2.... one of them is i remember going to school... but everywhere i will see a rectangular black thing( which i can't really recall what issit) and every1 will be holding it..... and whenever i see that black thing... i will feel extreme heartache... its not the normal 1.. it feels as if there's a an invisible force (jedi arr charlie xD) surrounding my heart ... slowly crushing it continuously.....its really v v unbearable... i have never ever had this feeling before... really feel very hopeless.. and feel like giving up on life... felt like ending everything... well... the other dream was a secret... anyway i woke up in the morning ... feeling extremely groggy and horrible... and i took a shower... not long after.. my parents were pounding on the door yelling at me to bathe faster... and all along keep scolding me - _ - IRRITATING LA!! cos mi cousin wanted to use the toilet... as she had to go to school ( me too la) when i came out my kept nagging at me about me being irresponsible and using the toilet too long... actually i really didnt noe my cousin needs to use the toilet... i really thought she had finished using it.. cos normally last year she wakes up at 5.30 to use it.. - _ - so i told mi mom tt... and she said im irresponsible and don't keep assuming.. so i got frustrated ... and shouted back at her.. and she slapped me... - _ - fuck man... the slap doesnt really matter... i was really sad over something else... and thanks to the slap it triggered my emotions and i finally cried for the first time in a very long time... (ya baby boy bla bla) whatever.. but im really glad i cried... i had always wanted to do so... but jus couldnt cry... anyway... cried le and made me feel better... and i got ready to go to school.... the MRT was freaking packed !!! ( as if its normally empty xD) haha anyway... i only get to sit down at city hall and slept all the way to commonwealth MRT station.. xD lucky not boon lay ar.. hahaha met my poly friends and went for tutorial.... on the way up the hill to School of Life Sciences and Chemical Technology... one of mi girl classmates came down saying the lecturer is absent - _ - wake up so early for nth!!! so we went down the hill to canteen 2.... BUT!!! when we reachin canteen 2... another classmate called and said the lecturer was here... de note was for ytd!!! WTF!!! walk up the hill again la!!! kns... oh man.... anyway nth much happened in school except tt we went to SIM to eat ... not nice lor the mixed vegetable rice - _ -yucks!!! I REALLY MISS 4E1!!!! ITS LIKE IM THROWN INTO THE WEST WHERE I NOE NOBODY AND UNFAMILIAR WITH THE ENVIRONMENT... I REALLY MISS MY SECONDARY SCHOOL LIFE!!!! I SEEM TO BE UNABLE TO ACCEPT TT IM MOVING ON WIF LIFE AND LEAVE MY SEC SCH LIFE BEHIND T_T I REALLY MISS 4E1...